• I was never “whipped” and never had the “you just know” feeling. • I had never had a girlfriend for longer than 8 months before. That my moral code and integrity were my most valued traits.

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Sometimes as specified earlier, it could be a self-esteem issue in that their need for validation is so strong, that once they perceive it as being obtained, they move on to the next person in an endless pursuit of “strokes” from other people that they’re “good enough” and valued.

And sometimes these men are married in heterosexual marriages or are already partnered in a gay relationship with someone else and will never fully be available or have any intention of deepening a relationship with the single, yet hopeful gay dater.

If you have a history of being a “player” and you’re starting a new dating relationship and genuinely want to develop it further, your past could come back to haunt you if you’re not up front and honest with your new love interest.

It can be a small world, and the last thing you want is to run into a scorned “ex” when you’re out on the town with your new boyfriend.

I’m not sure if you were looking for a physical object (like the aforementioned magic wand), a personality test (like the 436 questions on e Harmony’s profile), or maybe just a subtle series of questions that you can drop into every day conversation (ex.

“Are you a player or are you a genuinely sincere guy?

This article will shed some light on the profile of a “player”, provide some tips for the “ex-player” to promote successful dating relationships without letting his past destroy genuine opportunities, and suggest potential warning signs for the gay dater that might signal that the guy he’s seeing might actually be a “player.” My definition of a “player” is someone who’s not really on the “up and up” in his dating interactions and intentions with others. This type of individual tends to be manipulative and self-centered, using people to meet his own needs in a selfish way that disregards the feelings of others.

He tends to be very crafty and creative in his efforts to win a person over to obtain gratification of his sought-after goal and can be insensitive to the needs and wants of the other.

I was recently interviewed by freelance writer Caroline Stanley from for a cover story she was writing about dating “player-types”.